Here I am, with the contents of my house spread out on the grass. (We treated my home with pesticide in an attempt to kill the little bugs that are eating my bamboo siding.) My neighbors came over and observed, "Begui, you have a lot of stuff." I do, compared with them, and I've always been a bit of a hoarder besides. As much as it may look like I'm living the simple life, I'm definitely not on the margin. Take a look at a similar series of photos from around the world.
I don't like things that emphasize the difference between me and the Panamanians., whether that's how much stuff I have in the house, how much money I make every month (something they can only guess at), or the opportunities that I have for education, travel, and career advancement. I don't like people pointing out the gap between us. There's one man in my community for whom the United States, I think, stands for everything good; all golden opportunity. When I go over to his house he says things like, "You've come to see how the other world lives," "Over there they don't sleep on hard bamboo beds like this do they?" or "Over there you won't see babies playing in the dirt like ours, will you?" The way he says it feels like an accusation.
But it's true, we're not the same in many ways. In other ways, our humanity and spirituality, culture and nation don't matter. Part of the process of cultural adaptation, I'm told, is becoming more comfortable in your own shoes. When coming from one culture to another, I have to find the space I stand, in-between.
I just added some photos to the previous post so if you've already read that one, take another look.
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